First Person Present Tense

I love this post by Lydia over at The Sharp Angle.

It perfectly addresses a point I was trying to make to a fellow writer a few weeks ago. I was advised that shifting from present to past was too confusing. I felt it was no more confusing than a real person speaking of what was happening at that moment and what happened last night. As long as the change in time frame was made clear, there was no problem. However,I went on and changed my current work to past tense.

I am not nearly as happy with it,because as I said and Lydia agreed, it lost the sense of immediacy.

After reading Lydia's words, I may revisit present tense.

First Page (Revised)- Young Adult

“I know what you are.”

The words were little more than a breath. I gasped for air feeling as though I were spiraling through an endless tunnel away from Gran. We had connected this time, and she had something important to tell me. Try as I might, I could not hold on to her voice.

He spoke in a whisper, but I heard it plainly this time. The cold shadow of a voice broke through my amateur defenses without warning. They were getting stronger, getting closer to overtaking me now that I was completely off my meds.

I could’ve stayed on the medication, but I didn’t like the way it left me feeling empty inside, nothing but a walking corpse. So I’d come of the drugs gradually, and with that had come everything that they told me was not real, everything that I wanted to escape.

Tears tried to force their way out.

I refused to give in to that nagging fear that maybe I was going crazy. Images of the sterile, white hospital halls and stern faced medical staff invaded my head. Crazy would be bad, worse than bad. But the alternative was no better.

Writing Progress

Just to let you know...I have not managed to revise my entire novel as planned! I have been working full time for the past few weeks, which is good financially, but bad for my writing. Also, I have rewritten the first two chapters in the double digits by now. It's not going as quickly as I wanted, but I am making progress.

NaNoWriMo looms too closely on the horizon. I'm going to give it another go this year, but I don't have the confidence that I would like to have at this point. Fifty thousand words in a month, working full time, taking care of family and home, and trying to revise the current novel. Hmmm.

I'm going to need my superpowers! Where is that cape?

First Page- Young Adult Fiction

Would you want to read more? Be honest.


I was at peace for the first time in months, almost hypnotized by the birds circling the bright summer sky above me. The only thing that kept me tied to this world was the chill of the water. I closed my eyes and gave in to the sensation, let my mind go where it wanted. Usually I avoided thoughts of my father’s death and the aftermath at all costs. But being in the water again felt like home, and I just wanted to quit trying so hard for a little while.

A voice was in my head before my eyes completely closed, one of the many that crept in unwanted. I didn't try to make out her words. I didn’t really listen to most of what she told me back then. She sat in her floral armchair, one leg drawn up under the other, and watched me while her shoeless foot idly wiggled. I told her the things she wanted to hear.

“I miss my dad. This isn’t fair!” Sometimes I brought on just a tear or two, never enough to be in danger of really breaking down. “Everything reminds me that he isn’t here anymore.”

She nodded her head compassionately, causing her sleek white-blond hair to bob up and down on her shoulders. She tried to make me feel better and I pretended to listen while my mind wandered.

Was this really what she wanted to do with her life? Sit and listen to other people’s problems even though she couldn’t actually help them. Maybe she could change their outlook, but that wouldn't help in my case.

There was no way I was going to get better, at least not until I could find a way to quiet the voices.

Writing Progress

So here we are. It's Thursday, the day that I should have had chapter one polished to a gleaming jewel. What I actually have is a rewritten chapter one that I am happier with than the rough draft. Rather than post it here, I am trying to post on a writer's forum for some much needed feedback. If it comes back reader worthy, I'll post a snippet here.

I am listening to Norah Jones on the iPod. I turn to her when I am in need of soothing sounds.

Why is it the internet always seems to slow down at the precise moment when you are trying to post something? I sit here watching the little circle spin endlessly around, and wonder if that is just some programmers cruel little trick.

I envision miniature evil minions running rampant thru the Internet signals creating roadblocks for the information highway. The programmers know this, but they also know there is nothing they can do to stop the evil minions. They present you with the rotating circles knowing that you will eventually just give up on this try and come back later.

And that's exactly what I do. What other choice do I have against evil little minions and cruel programmers?

Setting Short (and Shorter) Term Goals

Good Morning! At least it's off to a fairly good start for me. The kids are off to school on time, the major part of the clutter is picked up,and a load of laundry has been started. I have now made it to my computer with a nice hot cup of coffee. If only I had a lovely chocolate hazelnut biscotti to go with it. Ah well, maybe next time.

I have been putting of the rewriting of my first novel for far too long. Having never revised more than a short story or a term paper before, I have been frozen. I have had absolutely no clue what to do. I have been reading, reading, reading all the advice for beginning writers, but the thing is there is just so much varying advice that I still didn't know how to start.

Finally, I realized that I was never going to even get started if I didn't impose a deadline on myself. I officially started writing the novel last November, so I have set my deadline for revisions for October 31. I hope at this time that it will be fit for submission to agents.

So deadline imposed. Now what? It didn't take me long to figure out that putting sticky notes here and there in my manuscript and making notes in my journal were only going to take me so far. I need a more manageable goal than finish by Halloween.

I came up with an average number of current pages that I need to revise each day to meet my goal. This seems to work for me so far, the same way I planned an average number of words per day to finish NaNoWriMo. At this point, I need to revise approximately five current pages per day each weekday to finish on schedule.

Wow! I feel like I've finally got it. That means that I should have Chapter One rewritten and polished by this Thursday. Suddenly I have something more immediate, more tangible that I feel like I can accomplish.

This is now my plan- to work thru my revisions one chunk at a time. After that stroke of genius, I realized that I need to put my other responsiblities thru the same process.

So here we are, early morning chores completed, writing time started, afternoon responsiblities prioritized. I feel confident that this is acheivable.

(Let's hope nobody throws a wrench in my plans. I don't have a solution for that yet)

New Ventures

Being a stay at home mom with all the kids in school now can tend to get mind numbingly boring. Really. Laundry, dishes, and dusting really don't provide much entertainment. The lack of teaching jobs in my area have left me wondering if it is time to give up on the idea of returning to the classroom and move on to something else. The problem is I just don't know what else to do.
In the meantime,to cover the financial gaps I have been trying everything from going coupon crazy, participating in online surveys, and collecting swagbucks for amazon gift cards. It's become a highlight of my day to tell the dear hubby about my latest deal.
Not a lot of help financially, but I'll take anything I can get right now.

Neglected

Okay. So this blog has been neglected for far too long. There are a myriad of excuses. The kids have been home all summer leaving no time for blogging. I was busy rewriting last year's NaNoWriMo novel. I forgot my password. My mind went blank for a very long time.
But really, it was just that fatal flaw of procrastination. Funny how "I'll do that in just a minute" quickly turns into months and months. Actually it's not really funny. But here I am trying to get back into the swing of things.

Book of the Week

Fablehaven by Richard Mull.

This story was an entertaining escapade with fantasy creatures. The adventure for this brother and sister duo begins as they find themselves sent to the grandparents they hardly know. Upon arrival they are set up in their attic bedroom filled with assorted amusements and given a very clear set of rules designed to protect them. As expected one follows rules determinedly while the other constantly breaks them. The children learn that things are not normal at their grandparents' estate, staring with their missing Grandmother. As their learn more about the unusual home, they begin making choices that have serious consequences We learn that always following the rules can be just as detrimental as breaking them.In the story, as in real life, there must be a little bit of each.